Mix sweet shop
12oz Soy Mocha
I don't get the obsession with celebrity. I have been trying to think of any famous person that I would just completely lose my shhh-tuff over (ohai, mom). Name your biggest, sexiest, richest movie star, rock star, whatever, and I would probably not say a word to them if they were right here in front of me. There are more than a few that would get a smile, or maybe a polite nod - some might even get an eyebrow pop, and an extra long glance of appreciation when they're not looking. But the truth is, I treat anyone this way just walking down the street. I am just polite, friendly, and I respect peoples' space.
There are a handful of notable people I might legitimately geek out over, just a bit - Stephen Colbert and Neil DeGrasse Tyson come to mind. If I had the chance, I'd love to hang out and chat. But I really cannot picture myself getting all giggly and hyperventilate-y over them. Or anyone for that matter. Seriously. President Obama? "Leader of the Free World?" Oh-ho, you better sit down, buddy, 'cause I have words for you, sir. That would be my greatest stress (outside of the retinue of Secret Service staring me down) - trying to condense my opinion down to the handful of moments allotted under such a meeting.
For most people, though, under most circumstances, I don't think I'd say a word. I know some celebrities like to be acknowledged for their work, but I don't think a one of them wants to be accosted non-stop by rabid fan-girls and -boys who think they have some right to this person just because they're famous. I cannot think of anything I have to say that is so important that I would interpose myself into a complete stranger's life at the most inopportune moments. Especially not for my own gratification. If I felt truly compelled to speak to someone, I'd apologize for the interruption, offer my appreciation (or whatever) for their work (or whatever), and then I'd leave them the hell alone. I wouldn't ask for an autograph (that is another thing I do not understand). I doubt I'd ask for a picture. It would be pretty close to the level of interrupting someone to compliment their hat.
So what is behind the cult of celebrity in our culture? Why do people think that these celebrities are something greater than mere human beings? And, more importantly, why do they feel they have the right to unfettered access? I understand that these famous people are familiar to us, in a distant sort of way. I've run into my small share of famous people, and it's jarring at first. They are the familiar stranger. There's a weird kind of intimacy. But you know their faces they way you know national monuments you've never been to but have seen all your life. They are like the Grand Canyon or the Statue of Liberty. And you can read all the books you want, look at all the pictures, the movies... but you don't know the place till you're there.
But the Grand Canyon and the Statue of Liberty are things that we are all, on some level, entitled to. Celebrities are not. They are just people. They have their public professions, and they have their private lives. Paparazzi and the like will argue that celebrities want to be gawked at and photographed and interrogated. I call bull pucky! Yes, some people want to be famous for the sake of being famous and popular. I think even those people have their limits, though. But whatever the percentage of reluctance for for fame for any given celebrity, it does not change the fact that the rest of us have no inherent right to their life story.
I did not appreciate the level of ferocity of the paparazzi until I was nearly mowed down by three of them in pursuit of Paris Hilton. At the time, I was working as an assistant manager in a movie theatre in West Los Angeles, so I made a point of informing the other managers on duty that we had a VIP guest, so that we could keep an eye out for any inappropriate behavior from fanboys or paparazzi. As soon as I announced this, however, one of the other managers bolted for the door. Apparently, she was a huge fan. I could only shake my head.
As I write this, Moby's "Porcelain" has just started playing overhead. (I think this is the second time I've mentioned him in a blog, come to think of it). I guess this would be the one celebrity I would probably introduce myself to were he to wander into this coffeehouse. Because Moby - I think I do owe a word of thanks to him.
After all, Henry and Oliver are just a little bit his fault.
There are many things that had to happen for my boys to exist. First and foremost, Greg and I had to celebrate certain holidays irresponsibly. But go back farther - our parents had to meet, had to hook up... the Big Bang had to do some banging, too... All things had to happen as they happened for the world to exist as it does with our boys in it. We had to make all the decisions we made throughout our lives - including the decisions to get on moby.com and sign up for the message boards that were once hosted there. That's right - Greg and I met online. On Moby's website.
And before you accuse me of hypocrisy, you should know that I am not a "fan" - not because I don't like his music. After more than a decade, I still cannot seem to get "Play" out of my car, no matter how many times I take it out of the CD holder. But I am clearly not the fangirl type. He had (has?) an amusing blog, and it was before Facebook. That's my excuse.
So, while the ending of apartheid in South Africa may still have been necessary for the world to manifest in such a way that Greg and I would meet in time to have our two beautiful boys, Moby would be a more direct catalyst for their existence. For that, I would take the time to say thank you. If I thought he'd get it, maybe I'd even send him a little card with a family pic (not the one with the handsy Santa Claus) and the brief tale of our unusual courtship.
Either way, I would still not freak out. Because I am not a fan. I equate "fan" with "fanatic." But I do appreciate his work. I guess I am the un-fan.
Saturday, June 8, 2013
Saturday, June 1, 2013
The Best of the Best of the Best!!!
Evo's Coffee Lounge
12oz soy mocha
almond pastry thingy
What if we didn't value dominance?
I asked that question, rhetorically, in some other blog that I'm too lazy to look up. The question came back to me in a roundabout way today because of a dress. The dress I'm wearing today is very pretty but it's definitely shorter than I typically wear. My legs almost never see this much daylight, and even my farmer's tan is at risk of being evenly burned. So, when I found that I was a little anxious getting out of the car to take the short walk to the coffeehouse, I decided to explore where that feeling was coming from.
Answers were not hard to find. First, I found a fear of attention that was a little too positive, if you know what I mean. I have received the message that if you dress attractively, and with less fabric obstruction, then you are making yourself a target for attack. Then the flip side fear revealed itself. What if I wasn't attractive enough to be wearing a dress that revealed so much of my socially offensive body? The Group would surely turn against me for my inferior legs and flabby arms... It's amazing what you find in your head when you look inside it. And once I saw all these feelings, they lost their power. Not only are they not reflective of the over-arching reality, but screw those guys, anyway.
There's a great meme going 'round the internet that goes...
How to get a bikini body:
1. Get a bikini.
2. Put it on your body.
TA-DA!
The truth is, if I saw someone of lesser cheekbones and wider girth wearing this same dress, I wouldn't give a rat's ass about her supposed flaws - they wouldn't even register. I'd probably stop her to say what a lovely dress it was and how great she looked. Despite all the messaging from society and all your fears from high school, most people don't care. They don't have the emotional reserves to judge you because they're too busy worrying what other people will think of them.
This is not to say that there aren't people who judge you and try to condemn you and bully you. I'm saying that it's just not so many as you think. And I think that those who do it are acting on that social value I mentioned before: dominance. Everything about our society is infused with this idea of ranking, and specifically the rank of Number 1. It used to be about which class you belonged to - peasantry, gentry, royalty. Unless you were the king, there was always someone better than you (hence, the phrase "your betters"). And when the king was reminded that even he was below Him, suddenly royalty were divinely chosen and referred to with the royal "we" because, if he couldn't be above God, he was going to share the top of the platform with Him.
I can't say I know enough of the subtle evolution of this idea through history - perhaps it was meritocracy itself - but as the class system started to fall away, society kept up this rationale for dominance. The common man had to at least be the best at something: the smartest, the strongest, the fastest. Competition for dominance... so you can feel secure, free even... For women, whose security evolved to mean something provided for her by a husband instead of derived from a solid marital partnership - or from that shocking notion of her own professional efforts - the competition became focused on her rank in beauty. The prettiest girl gets the richest husband and is, thus, the most secure. The most happy. Sure. We've come a long way, but we are not a lot closer to freeing ourselves from this mentality.
And can we just take a moment to recognize how dumb is the objectification of women? Reducing women to mere objects is like trying to quench your thirst with diet coke. It get's your mouth wet, but it doesn't hydrate your body. It over-stimulates you so that you don't have adequate time to get all the nutrients you need - in this case, the emotional nutrition of a healthy relationship. Oh, and it's full of aspartame which is so poisonous they advise pregnant women not to drink it... and it actually causes you to crave more sugar because your body recognizes that you've tricked it with empty calories and withheld promised sweetness.
So, yeah... objectification is dumb and poisonous.
The notion of not thinking that The Best is the best is so contrary to everything we've been taught that it's hard to even contemplate. What would society look like? What if there was no value in being the richest? Would the environment be as devastated, workers as exploited? What if we didn't care who wore it better? Could we all but eliminate the market for plastic surgery? And anti-depressants? What if we didn't care which sports team had gone undefeated?
Who won?
Who cares?
As I listen to the man with the guitar singing outside, I wonder how much happier would we all be if we didn't care who was the best singer and just encouraged everyone to sing?
Even when we try to "value" the non-winners in our society, we still frame it by rank. It's okay that this kid is too scrawny to be on the football team because he's a whiz at math. As in, he's smarter than other people - he's better than other people at something. What if he isn't good at math? What if this kid really isn't good at anything? He's not a genius, he's not an athlete, he's not creative. The kind message is that he's still part of society and we can put up with his existence in a magnanimous sort of way. But the full message is that he has no real value to society and the rest of us with better scores in whatever are just tolerating him. In fact, we're sacrificing ourselves in some way - our time or money or whatever - to take care of him. And that increases our superiority.
What bullshit.
But people are afraid of this specter of mediocrity. People actually argue against raising minimum wage, for example, because they are afraid that if people have enough to survive then they will become complacent and never strive to better themselves, and we would all be doomed. Doooomed, people! This is nonsense. This is some kind of throwback to a primitive state of the world. Then, it would be a problem if no one in your tribe felt like putting the work in to farm or hunt. If they all got fat and lazy they would be easy pickins for that lion or that war-mongering tribe over the hill. Everyone had to work because it was life or death, not just for the slacker, but for the whole tribe. But that isn't the world we live in now.
So... the origin of the work ethic is understandable, and even of the value of superiority and dominance, because strength and survival were so intertwined. And later, the need to justify the rights and privileges being demanded by the lesser members of society would obviously continue the tendency towards proving some type of comparative superiority. Or at least potential for superiority. But nowadays, we need to step back and see this supposed value for what it is: Insecurity.
Fear.
And I am so sick of this notion of American Exceptionalism... It's just another excuse to justify some kind of dominance or other. I do believe that the ideas upon which America was founded are exceptional to human history. That is because the foundational concept of this country is that all human beings are equal to all others, even those who happened to be born in other countries. There is nothing different in American DNA that would justify our dominance over any other person or country. We are all the same monsters and all the same angels and we have all the same human rights.
What if, instead of valuing dominance, we valued excellence? And excellence not because it makes one superior but because it could be the best path to make one happy and fulfilled. Competing to win leaves you vulnerable to unhappiness if others succeed. Competing to be excellent leaves you satisfied knowing you have achieved the best you are capable of achieving, no matter which place you finish in. An excellent human being does not provoke or suppress others. An excellent human being encourages others to be excellent. And that is the greatest value for all of us.
So, I charge you now to live by these great and simple words of wisdom given to us by Wyld Stallyns:
"Be excellent to each other."
Oh, and, "party on, dudes."
12oz soy mocha
almond pastry thingy
What if we didn't value dominance?
I asked that question, rhetorically, in some other blog that I'm too lazy to look up. The question came back to me in a roundabout way today because of a dress. The dress I'm wearing today is very pretty but it's definitely shorter than I typically wear. My legs almost never see this much daylight, and even my farmer's tan is at risk of being evenly burned. So, when I found that I was a little anxious getting out of the car to take the short walk to the coffeehouse, I decided to explore where that feeling was coming from.
Answers were not hard to find. First, I found a fear of attention that was a little too positive, if you know what I mean. I have received the message that if you dress attractively, and with less fabric obstruction, then you are making yourself a target for attack. Then the flip side fear revealed itself. What if I wasn't attractive enough to be wearing a dress that revealed so much of my socially offensive body? The Group would surely turn against me for my inferior legs and flabby arms... It's amazing what you find in your head when you look inside it. And once I saw all these feelings, they lost their power. Not only are they not reflective of the over-arching reality, but screw those guys, anyway.
There's a great meme going 'round the internet that goes...
How to get a bikini body:
1. Get a bikini.
2. Put it on your body.
TA-DA!
The truth is, if I saw someone of lesser cheekbones and wider girth wearing this same dress, I wouldn't give a rat's ass about her supposed flaws - they wouldn't even register. I'd probably stop her to say what a lovely dress it was and how great she looked. Despite all the messaging from society and all your fears from high school, most people don't care. They don't have the emotional reserves to judge you because they're too busy worrying what other people will think of them.
This is not to say that there aren't people who judge you and try to condemn you and bully you. I'm saying that it's just not so many as you think. And I think that those who do it are acting on that social value I mentioned before: dominance. Everything about our society is infused with this idea of ranking, and specifically the rank of Number 1. It used to be about which class you belonged to - peasantry, gentry, royalty. Unless you were the king, there was always someone better than you (hence, the phrase "your betters"). And when the king was reminded that even he was below Him, suddenly royalty were divinely chosen and referred to with the royal "we" because, if he couldn't be above God, he was going to share the top of the platform with Him.
I can't say I know enough of the subtle evolution of this idea through history - perhaps it was meritocracy itself - but as the class system started to fall away, society kept up this rationale for dominance. The common man had to at least be the best at something: the smartest, the strongest, the fastest. Competition for dominance... so you can feel secure, free even... For women, whose security evolved to mean something provided for her by a husband instead of derived from a solid marital partnership - or from that shocking notion of her own professional efforts - the competition became focused on her rank in beauty. The prettiest girl gets the richest husband and is, thus, the most secure. The most happy. Sure. We've come a long way, but we are not a lot closer to freeing ourselves from this mentality.
And can we just take a moment to recognize how dumb is the objectification of women? Reducing women to mere objects is like trying to quench your thirst with diet coke. It get's your mouth wet, but it doesn't hydrate your body. It over-stimulates you so that you don't have adequate time to get all the nutrients you need - in this case, the emotional nutrition of a healthy relationship. Oh, and it's full of aspartame which is so poisonous they advise pregnant women not to drink it... and it actually causes you to crave more sugar because your body recognizes that you've tricked it with empty calories and withheld promised sweetness.
So, yeah... objectification is dumb and poisonous.
The notion of not thinking that The Best is the best is so contrary to everything we've been taught that it's hard to even contemplate. What would society look like? What if there was no value in being the richest? Would the environment be as devastated, workers as exploited? What if we didn't care who wore it better? Could we all but eliminate the market for plastic surgery? And anti-depressants? What if we didn't care which sports team had gone undefeated?
Who won?
Who cares?
As I listen to the man with the guitar singing outside, I wonder how much happier would we all be if we didn't care who was the best singer and just encouraged everyone to sing?
Even when we try to "value" the non-winners in our society, we still frame it by rank. It's okay that this kid is too scrawny to be on the football team because he's a whiz at math. As in, he's smarter than other people - he's better than other people at something. What if he isn't good at math? What if this kid really isn't good at anything? He's not a genius, he's not an athlete, he's not creative. The kind message is that he's still part of society and we can put up with his existence in a magnanimous sort of way. But the full message is that he has no real value to society and the rest of us with better scores in whatever are just tolerating him. In fact, we're sacrificing ourselves in some way - our time or money or whatever - to take care of him. And that increases our superiority.
What bullshit.
But people are afraid of this specter of mediocrity. People actually argue against raising minimum wage, for example, because they are afraid that if people have enough to survive then they will become complacent and never strive to better themselves, and we would all be doomed. Doooomed, people! This is nonsense. This is some kind of throwback to a primitive state of the world. Then, it would be a problem if no one in your tribe felt like putting the work in to farm or hunt. If they all got fat and lazy they would be easy pickins for that lion or that war-mongering tribe over the hill. Everyone had to work because it was life or death, not just for the slacker, but for the whole tribe. But that isn't the world we live in now.
So... the origin of the work ethic is understandable, and even of the value of superiority and dominance, because strength and survival were so intertwined. And later, the need to justify the rights and privileges being demanded by the lesser members of society would obviously continue the tendency towards proving some type of comparative superiority. Or at least potential for superiority. But nowadays, we need to step back and see this supposed value for what it is: Insecurity.
Fear.
And I am so sick of this notion of American Exceptionalism... It's just another excuse to justify some kind of dominance or other. I do believe that the ideas upon which America was founded are exceptional to human history. That is because the foundational concept of this country is that all human beings are equal to all others, even those who happened to be born in other countries. There is nothing different in American DNA that would justify our dominance over any other person or country. We are all the same monsters and all the same angels and we have all the same human rights.
What if, instead of valuing dominance, we valued excellence? And excellence not because it makes one superior but because it could be the best path to make one happy and fulfilled. Competing to win leaves you vulnerable to unhappiness if others succeed. Competing to be excellent leaves you satisfied knowing you have achieved the best you are capable of achieving, no matter which place you finish in. An excellent human being does not provoke or suppress others. An excellent human being encourages others to be excellent. And that is the greatest value for all of us.
So, I charge you now to live by these great and simple words of wisdom given to us by Wyld Stallyns:
"Be excellent to each other."
Oh, and, "party on, dudes."
Saturday, May 18, 2013
Skepticism is more of a "Hmm" than a "HA!"
Cafe 116
Rawanda "Pour-Over" (coffee)
Mexican Tea Cookie
Rustic Veggie Soup
Yep, it's a frou-frou coffeehouse today. But it's pretty good stuff. I just felt like hanging downtown, occupying some valuable window real estate for a few hours.
So. I posted that phrase - skepticism is more of a "Hmm" than a "HA!" - and I was very disappointed at the number of "Like"s it didn't get. I thought I'd said something profound. Apparently, I must elaborate.
First, there's a lot of bad science out there. There's pseudoscience and conspiracy theories, and a lot of skewed headlines that take a legitimate study that says one thing and make it sound like it's saying another thing entirely. There are a lot of - okay, a WHOLE LOT of - people using scientific studies or statistics to back up claims that those studies don't show. I'll give you an example:
One of the claims that opponents of same-sex marriage make is that "studies show" that gay people are more likely to abuse children. I looked this up. The studies being referenced actually show the exact opposite. In the two major surveys in question, the perpetrators were overwhelmingly male. They were also overwhelmingly men who identified themselves as straight. Men who identified themselves as gay were disproportionately less likely to be abusers: only 1 or 2 out of a hundred in one study, and zero in the other study. To my recollection. But opponents of gay marriage make their claims based on the fact that both male and female children were abused by these mostly male predators. They are conflating the abuse of these boys with consensual adult homosexuality. By that logic, prison rape (or just prison sex) would count as "gay sex," and we would then have to conclude that we are incarcerating gay Americans at a greatly disproportionate rate to the overall population. Something should be done!
But the hot anti-logic du jour has to be the rampant conspiracy theorists terrorizing our political system. That's such a hostile sounding sentence when I reread it. Let me throw down the caveats. First, conspiracy theorists have been around since long before the beginning of this country, and they occupy all points along the political spectrum. And I do not categorically disdain conspiracy theorists. They are actually kinda "my people," and I will beg apologies now for some of the dumbass things I have said, especially as a teenager. That does not, however, mean that I only like the conspiracy theories that align with my political philosophies. The point is that not all conspiracy theories are created equal.
The reason that I would deride birthers, for example, is that there is nothing about their claims that stands up to scrutiny. Upon scrutiny, it is plainly clear that the originator of the myth is biased and has a history of making false claims that have been subsequently debunked. The logic used to explain the planning of this conspiracy is highly convoluted. And the fact that legally recognized documents have been produced throughout the lifetime of the president that have faced no question makes it an improbable claim. The long-form birth certificate should never have had to be produced because of the ridiculousness of this myth. I don't have a long-form birth certificate, but the DMV and Social Security Administration (and, thus, Homeland Security) were completely satisfied with my short-form birth certificate. Why would it suddenly no longer adequately show my age and place of birth if I chose to run for office? Oh, that's right - it is adequate, just for everyone else except this guy.
If you are too lazy to scrutinize, and if you are being told by people you trust to be honest arbiters of information (FOX News, elected officials) that the birth certificate is suspect, then it's easy to see how the myth could have been sustained for so long. At this point, though, after all the vetting, the production of the long-form birth certificate, and the verification by a bi-partisan assortment of government officials, if you're still a birther then you have no desire to be otherwise. You don't want the truth, you just want to have a reason to hate the guy.
And there's the difference between questioning for the sake of finding the truth and questioning for the sake of validating your opinion. I don't have a problem questioning the official storyline, questioning common beliefs. I find no reason to believe that this government couldn't be hiding something. America isn't inherently impervious to corruption. However, I don't believe it is inherently corrupt, either. Because of the very vastness of the government, and of the many checks on authority we have built in to the system, I think it is much more unlikely to have corruption across the board. I think we are losing many of those checks, though, and that is inherently dangerous. For now, though, I think that corruption, where it exists, tends to be localized and limited. Which is not to say that a handful of corrupt officials can't do far-reaching damage, just that it is not likely to be the whole system working against you.
Logically, speaking.
And that's all science is: the method of logic. Some people deride science as if it's some kind of mean-spirited religion. An institution of kill-joys. True scientists - skeptics, in general - are only out to find the truth. We may all like it when science validates some of our preconceived opinions, but we value the truth more, even when our beliefs are proved wrong. And not just partial truth. The whole truth. And even then, we'll still add an asterisk.
The problem with a lot of unconventional or conspiratorial theories, is that there is often some amount of truth to them. That's why I like watching those Ancient Aliens shows on the History Channel. They often will bring up some bit of trivia that is true and that I was previously unaware of. The problem is that they will then make conclusions that are not makeable. The beauty and the burden of science is that science says only what it can say. If it's good science, well-designed and focused in its scope, then it will be able to say a lot. Mostly, it will be able to say what "isn't." If it's weak, all it can do is offer more questions, at best, and confuse, at worst.
So, if you're still confused about what I mean by "hmm" versus "HA!" I'll try one last time to be explicit. When someone offers an explanation, a bit of knowledge or information, a skeptic will say, "hmm," and will then analyze the proposed information logically if they want to reach a conclusion about its veracity. A skeptic will not immediately say, "HA! See? I was right, and you're an idiot!" if they are offered something that appeals to their biases. Even smart people do this; it's part of our base instincts. But it's important to guard against this reflex... read the label before you eat that chocolate bar someone has just handed you...
Unless you like the taste of sweet, sweet bullshit.
Rawanda "Pour-Over" (coffee)
Mexican Tea Cookie
Rustic Veggie Soup
Yep, it's a frou-frou coffeehouse today. But it's pretty good stuff. I just felt like hanging downtown, occupying some valuable window real estate for a few hours.
So. I posted that phrase - skepticism is more of a "Hmm" than a "HA!" - and I was very disappointed at the number of "Like"s it didn't get. I thought I'd said something profound. Apparently, I must elaborate.
First, there's a lot of bad science out there. There's pseudoscience and conspiracy theories, and a lot of skewed headlines that take a legitimate study that says one thing and make it sound like it's saying another thing entirely. There are a lot of - okay, a WHOLE LOT of - people using scientific studies or statistics to back up claims that those studies don't show. I'll give you an example:
One of the claims that opponents of same-sex marriage make is that "studies show" that gay people are more likely to abuse children. I looked this up. The studies being referenced actually show the exact opposite. In the two major surveys in question, the perpetrators were overwhelmingly male. They were also overwhelmingly men who identified themselves as straight. Men who identified themselves as gay were disproportionately less likely to be abusers: only 1 or 2 out of a hundred in one study, and zero in the other study. To my recollection. But opponents of gay marriage make their claims based on the fact that both male and female children were abused by these mostly male predators. They are conflating the abuse of these boys with consensual adult homosexuality. By that logic, prison rape (or just prison sex) would count as "gay sex," and we would then have to conclude that we are incarcerating gay Americans at a greatly disproportionate rate to the overall population. Something should be done!
But the hot anti-logic du jour has to be the rampant conspiracy theorists terrorizing our political system. That's such a hostile sounding sentence when I reread it. Let me throw down the caveats. First, conspiracy theorists have been around since long before the beginning of this country, and they occupy all points along the political spectrum. And I do not categorically disdain conspiracy theorists. They are actually kinda "my people," and I will beg apologies now for some of the dumbass things I have said, especially as a teenager. That does not, however, mean that I only like the conspiracy theories that align with my political philosophies. The point is that not all conspiracy theories are created equal.
The reason that I would deride birthers, for example, is that there is nothing about their claims that stands up to scrutiny. Upon scrutiny, it is plainly clear that the originator of the myth is biased and has a history of making false claims that have been subsequently debunked. The logic used to explain the planning of this conspiracy is highly convoluted. And the fact that legally recognized documents have been produced throughout the lifetime of the president that have faced no question makes it an improbable claim. The long-form birth certificate should never have had to be produced because of the ridiculousness of this myth. I don't have a long-form birth certificate, but the DMV and Social Security Administration (and, thus, Homeland Security) were completely satisfied with my short-form birth certificate. Why would it suddenly no longer adequately show my age and place of birth if I chose to run for office? Oh, that's right - it is adequate, just for everyone else except this guy.
If you are too lazy to scrutinize, and if you are being told by people you trust to be honest arbiters of information (FOX News, elected officials) that the birth certificate is suspect, then it's easy to see how the myth could have been sustained for so long. At this point, though, after all the vetting, the production of the long-form birth certificate, and the verification by a bi-partisan assortment of government officials, if you're still a birther then you have no desire to be otherwise. You don't want the truth, you just want to have a reason to hate the guy.
And there's the difference between questioning for the sake of finding the truth and questioning for the sake of validating your opinion. I don't have a problem questioning the official storyline, questioning common beliefs. I find no reason to believe that this government couldn't be hiding something. America isn't inherently impervious to corruption. However, I don't believe it is inherently corrupt, either. Because of the very vastness of the government, and of the many checks on authority we have built in to the system, I think it is much more unlikely to have corruption across the board. I think we are losing many of those checks, though, and that is inherently dangerous. For now, though, I think that corruption, where it exists, tends to be localized and limited. Which is not to say that a handful of corrupt officials can't do far-reaching damage, just that it is not likely to be the whole system working against you.
Logically, speaking.
And that's all science is: the method of logic. Some people deride science as if it's some kind of mean-spirited religion. An institution of kill-joys. True scientists - skeptics, in general - are only out to find the truth. We may all like it when science validates some of our preconceived opinions, but we value the truth more, even when our beliefs are proved wrong. And not just partial truth. The whole truth. And even then, we'll still add an asterisk.
The problem with a lot of unconventional or conspiratorial theories, is that there is often some amount of truth to them. That's why I like watching those Ancient Aliens shows on the History Channel. They often will bring up some bit of trivia that is true and that I was previously unaware of. The problem is that they will then make conclusions that are not makeable. The beauty and the burden of science is that science says only what it can say. If it's good science, well-designed and focused in its scope, then it will be able to say a lot. Mostly, it will be able to say what "isn't." If it's weak, all it can do is offer more questions, at best, and confuse, at worst.
So, if you're still confused about what I mean by "hmm" versus "HA!" I'll try one last time to be explicit. When someone offers an explanation, a bit of knowledge or information, a skeptic will say, "hmm," and will then analyze the proposed information logically if they want to reach a conclusion about its veracity. A skeptic will not immediately say, "HA! See? I was right, and you're an idiot!" if they are offered something that appeals to their biases. Even smart people do this; it's part of our base instincts. But it's important to guard against this reflex... read the label before you eat that chocolate bar someone has just handed you...
Unless you like the taste of sweet, sweet bullshit.
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Fun with Fibromyalgia
Evo's Coffee Lounge
12oz Iced Soy Mocha
If I were taking care of my fibromyalgia condition properly, then I would not be drinking a sugary caffeinated beverage right now. Let this not distract you from all my helpful tips, but let it remind you that it is necessary to tend to your spiritual happiness as you also tend to your physical well-being.
Sure.
I find myself explaining this stuff a lot, both what fibromyalgia is, and also how I cope with it. This shall be a lengthy one broken up into Prologue and Practical Fibromyalgia Stuff. There's some important stuff in each part that relates to each other, good stuff about stress in general, but I put the bolds in if you want to skip a bit. First, Prologue...
The first thing to know about fibromyalgia is that it is, in fact, real. Let no one, not even an old and venerable family doctor, tell you that it's all in your head. I once told my brother when he asked me that question - gently - that I didn't know if it had all started in my head, but it was definitely in my body now, and the trick was figuring out how to get it back up there. I didn't know that it was fibromyalgia then. I knew that I had a mysterious and severe allergy that had just preceded this intense and debilitating pain in my back. My doctor had asked at the onset about other fibromyalgia symptoms but I had dismissed them. Well, of course, I had pain elsewhere, but I was out of shape and I had always had aches and pains somewhere or other. And nothing was so bad as that one spot. So we tested for other conditions, ruled them out, and went with the theory that I was experiencing muscle spasms related to the allergy. We went through a few kinds of pain killers and I ended up on 400mg of Celebrex every day, as well as 40mg of Zyrtec for the allergy, for the next several years. Just so I could get through the day.
And you don't need to take my word that fibromyalgia (FS for short) is a legitimate thing just because someone as poor as me isn't going to shell out that amount of money on pills unless I absolutely have to. There is now demonstrable evidence of FS. According to the Mayo Clinic (I checked out their FS DVD from the library) MRIs of FS patients show that those patients' brains light up brighter and in different places to the same level of pain stimulus than the control subjects. I also heard on one of those doctor shows that there are measurable increases in stress hormones in the spinal fluid of FS patients. The muscles also function differently. When you curl your arm, for example, as the "inside" muscles contract the "outside" muscles normally relax, and vice versa for the opposite motion. Not so for FS sufferers. All the muscles stay tense for both motions.
Practically speaking, though, most doctors are not going to scan your brain to make a diagnosis. They're going to rely on your reported history, check that you have pain at at least 11 of 18 trigger points throughout your body, and ask about an assortment of side conditions - insomnia (basically standard), depression, IBS, TMJ, hypersensitivity to light or sound, sinus problems, and many more. About a dozen or so conditions, I think. And then, they're going to run a bunch of tests for other conditions, like lupus or rheumatoid arthritis, to rule them out. If those show up negative, your doc may prescribe one of the newer fibromyalgia drugs, and/or any variety of pain killers, and hope you're not an addict.
Here's the next thing to remember about fibromyalgia. The medical establishment is not sure what or why it is. They're not even exactly sure how those FS drugs are supposed to work on the condition. They have some ideas, they've made a lot of progress, found a lot of correlations, but they're still not sure. The prevailing theory is that the nerves of FS sufferers are overactive (over-reactive, might be a better way to phrase it), for some reason. There is another theory, though, that the problem is at the receiving end of the signal - in your head.
I read a book in the local author section by a Dr. Dryland (for your reference). The way he described it, FS is caused by chronic stress - either physical or mental, your brain doesn't differentiate. What happens is that your brain, responding to a fight or flight situation, will (among other things) pump out a lot of dopamine, which will restrict the amount of signals from your nerve endings that reach your brain. This way you can ignore your sprained ankle while you run away from the lion that's chasing you. The problem is that, in our modern society, the lion can be an evil boss or a crazy girlfriend or your checkbook, and you don't have the chance to get away, hide out in a cave, and recover. You are constantly, for a variety of reasons, in a state of fight-or-flight. Our bodies were not designed for this.
National Geographic put out a great documentary on stress - I highly recommend you Netflix it. It describes a multitude of ways in which chronic stress damages our health, mentally and physically. Dryland asserts that, for FS patients, the ability of the body to make dopamine is essentially worn out so that, as the stress continues, the brain can no longer filter out all the stimulus coming to it. Think of it as having your amp dialed up to 11 all the time. So, then, what used to be uncomfortable and could be ignored now hurts, and your body responds to protect you from this obvious injury. Your body tenses up around the "injury" to protect it as it heals, and because you don't have adequate opportunity to recover, the protective tension becomes a persistent pain of its own. And your body responds... and you can see how this perpetuates the problem.
This theory of FS as a stress-based condition fits best with my own experiences with fibromyalgia. I should also be clear, both theories recognize that there is a stress connection with FS. In all the literature I've read on it, it is noted that there is almost always a stress trigger that kicks off the onset of fibromyalgia. And that trigger could be a bad break-up (as was in the mix in my case) or a localized physical injury that persists until you no longer just hurt in your right knee, but now ache everywhere.
There is also likely to be some underlying stress that has been weakening your system until that one big stress comes along and kicks it off. In fact, they found such a high correlation between fibromyalgia and early childhood trauma that some people assumed that anyone who had FS had been abused as a child. That's an unfortunate stigma that is still being shaken off. But any kind of PTSD could do it. I've speculated that, because of the prevalence of PTSD among our veterans, fibromyalgia could be rampant and going unrecognized or undiagnosed. It's in the nature of a soldier to ignore pain, after all.
The good news, though, is that whether the cause is in the sender (the nerves) or the receiver (the brain), there is a lot that can be done to reduce the pain FS sufferers experience without the drugs. So, here's the practical stuff I've picked up over the years...
Practical Stress Reduction Tips for Sufferers...
(add a chocolate muffin to that list of what I'm not supposed to be doing... it's hot, it was looking on the verge of being all melty...)
1. SLEEP! You knew it was going to be the top of the list. It is the hardest and the most important piece of your pain puzzle. I was told by one of my physical therapists that six hours of good sleep is the absolute minimum your body needs to do its everyday repair work. Six goooood hours. If you have the insurance or the credit line to cover it, I highly recommend doing a sleep study. You may be getting more than six hours now (and your body might naturally want more than that for optimum function) but if you don't feel rested and refreshed and less achy when you get up, then there is probably some kind of undiagnosed sleep problem that is keeping your body from getting that deep sleep it needs to do that vital repair work.
2. Exercise. This is also vital and very, very difficult. From what I've read, there is little to no damage to the actual muscles of an FS sufferer beyond the regular damage of under-use. (You know, even "FS sufferer" is kind of cumbersome, so I think I'm going to start using "fibromyalgier" if you don't mind... You don't? Why, thank you!) The important thing to remember is to start extremely slow and gentle. But persistently. There are days I think I can do a mile or two, no problem, but end up knowing I've gone too far less than halfway out. And once I've hurt myself by overdoing it, it takes me much, much longer to recover. A simple knot in my calf can last weeks or longer, while the average person could work it out in a few days. So, just start with five minutes of walking every day. Then go up a minute each successive day. The main issue is consistency.
It's also worth the money to see a physical therapist, even if you can only do an initial consultation, because you've probably developed problems you are unaware of just by trying to compensate for the pain. It's also very common to have your pain shift around as you start working out one place or other. So, if you can't get regular visits, see if you can call in once in a while as things come up, and schedule a follow-up or two after several weeks so that you can adapt your exercises to your evolving needs.
Here's another side-note for those of you fibromyalgiers with hyper-mobile joints (i.e., the double-jointed)... There is a high correlation between FS and hypermobility, possibly because you may not realize that you are extra-stretchy all throughout your body and it is very easy to over-stretch your muscles simply because your ligaments will allow you to go farther than your muscles ought to. Think of it like having porcelain muscles and rag-doll joints. This makes a physical therapy plan extra important for you because you need more stability for your skeleton and are more likely to have your body over-correct itself as you begin P.T. (This problem is compounded when/if you get pregnant because your body releases a hormone to make your ligaments extra stretchier, fyi).
Oh, and exercise helps reduce your stress, boosts your mood, and helps you sleep.
3. Shrink your head... Or get someone to do it for you. Chances are there's some kind of unresolved something going on that needs to be properly addressed. Sometimes you just weren't screwed up enough to warrant professional help so you missed out on all these wonderful coping techniques that we "special" people got to be introduced to. In either case, it probably couldn't hurt to talk to someone (a little, or a lot), either to process some long over-due baggage, or just to get some good stress management tips.
4. Diet. A well-balanced diet is duh important for overall body function, helps your mood, and helps you sleep. But two more important things. First, chronic stress has damaged your gut. There was a study with rats that showed that even low levels of constant stress, but especially severe acute stress, will erode the lining of your intestines. This whacks you out in ways I can't even begin to describe. The important take-away is that it screws up how you process and produce stress hormones, which you can see is counter-productive for your goal of stress reduction. It's also probably causing a multitude of those uncomfortable secondary conditions, like IBS and lactose intolerance, and in my case, an allergic reaction to lactose intolerance. So in addition to not stressing out your system anymore with crap food, you should look into "reseeding" the good flora in your gut. I started with simple acidophilus pills and I was able to reverse my allergic reaction. I am no longer head to toe hives all day, every day, though I still take a couple dairy pills if I'm eating ice cream. If I were in optimum health, perhaps I wouldn't need that.
The second dietary note is that certain foods are going to make your pain worse simply because they have an inherent inflammatory effect. Sugar (whole natural sugars, like in fruit, are fine), caffeine, excite those nerve endings in anybody, but it's like pouring lemon juice on a paper cut if you have FS. Also, dairy and gluten (mostly from our modern, hybridized, processed wheat), are stressful to your gut, so you should try to avoid and minimize them, particularly in a single sitting.
Be careful with your milk alternatives, though. There are a lot of genetically modified (and unlabeled) ingredients and additives and artificial sweeteners (carrageenan was thought to be the new wonder alternative so it's in everything, but it's looking like it's not so great, either... better than flippin' aspertame, though). Also, there are now warnings against giving a lot of soy milk to young kids, especially boys, because it appears to be interfering with hormone function. Or something. Anyway, you generally don't have to avoid anything like the plague, just minimize and diversify. Look up diets that are specifically anti-inflammatory. And go as organic as you can afford. Our doc stresses organic for the animal-based foods, and for those top most contaminated fruits and veggies, like apples, strawberries, and spinach.
I gave up sugar while working in a chocolate shop. It can be done, and the results were dramatic. I had been going through a period of severe stress and I had been taking more and more pain killers than was recommended as my pain increased. I was relying on 9 (or more) naproxen sodium (Aleve) every day. Yes, it was that bad. The maximum dose is supposed to be 3. And it wasn't enough to knock it out. But at the same time I reached a kind of resolution to my major stressor, I cut out the sugar (quality checking the sample tray), and in less than a month I was down to two or three naproxen a day. And then I pregnant, but that's a whole other chapter in the fibromyalgia fun-book.
5. Magnesium and other pills. It's worth checking your vitamin and mineral levels, if possible, as part of your diagnostic process, to see if there are any deficiencies. And while I didn't turn up a deficiency in magnesium, I did find it very beneficial to take it as a supplement anyway. It is very popular among fibromyalgiers because it is a natural relaxant, so it helps with the pain and with your sleep. However, even with supplements, you should be consulting your doctor, or other knowledgeable practitioner (pharmacist, nutritionist). Even these natural supplements can interact with other medications and with each other. For example, calcium and magnesium kind of work against each other (calcium helps your muscles contract, as magnesium helps them relax), and vitamin D helps you process and produce calcium. All this was tricky for me to figure out, and it took a lot of trial and error and self-awareness to find where I need to be. I found that I needed to take at least double the magnesium as calcium, and that amount changed when I added the D (which I am deficient in). Most FS books I've read recommend starting with 300mg of magnesium, and adjusting from there as needed.
Other supplements I take for the pain include vitamin E, fish oil, and turmeric (anti-inflammatory) if I have the money and can get the brand I like. That last one has been inconsistent for me and I have found the benefit mostly in the higher dose and mostly a particular brand that included ginger, which may have affected its overall effectiveness. For me, at least. The bottom line is I can't afford to spend money on anything that isn't doing what it needs to do, and I drop things and reintroduce them periodically to make sure they are worth the cost and effort.
For mood, I take a B-complex, as well as a kind of methylfolate thingy (through my doctor's office, related to another deficiency they tested me for), and taurine (an amino acid), which hugely helped me transition off Zoloft many years ago.
I take a few other things - Vitamin C is a great booster for just about everything - but those are the core supplements that help for me. Oh, and I take some melatonin and (generic) Tylenol PM to help me sleep.
It's also important to focus on getting as much of these things naturally through your food, and to adjust your supplementing accordingly. This is what I suck at the most, but try to keep it in mind anyway.
6. Drugs. At some point, the pain needs to stop. You need that interruption for long enough to break the pain cycle and allow the healing process to begin. I can't tell you if any of the FS drugs are effective because I never took them. The important thing is that you try to focus on pain killers as a temporary intervention, but take what you need (don't exceed the recommended dosage) when you need to take it.
... So that's what works for me. When I'm good and do all that... I'm happy to get even more specific for anyone that would like to know more... like exact doses of pills, different exercises I've done, or how I had my second baby with no drugs... during the labor anyway... first question afterwards was, "can I have drugs now?"... For anyone else, though, I'm sure this is more than enough for now.
Fun times!
12oz Iced Soy Mocha
If I were taking care of my fibromyalgia condition properly, then I would not be drinking a sugary caffeinated beverage right now. Let this not distract you from all my helpful tips, but let it remind you that it is necessary to tend to your spiritual happiness as you also tend to your physical well-being.
Sure.
I find myself explaining this stuff a lot, both what fibromyalgia is, and also how I cope with it. This shall be a lengthy one broken up into Prologue and Practical Fibromyalgia Stuff. There's some important stuff in each part that relates to each other, good stuff about stress in general, but I put the bolds in if you want to skip a bit. First, Prologue...
The first thing to know about fibromyalgia is that it is, in fact, real. Let no one, not even an old and venerable family doctor, tell you that it's all in your head. I once told my brother when he asked me that question - gently - that I didn't know if it had all started in my head, but it was definitely in my body now, and the trick was figuring out how to get it back up there. I didn't know that it was fibromyalgia then. I knew that I had a mysterious and severe allergy that had just preceded this intense and debilitating pain in my back. My doctor had asked at the onset about other fibromyalgia symptoms but I had dismissed them. Well, of course, I had pain elsewhere, but I was out of shape and I had always had aches and pains somewhere or other. And nothing was so bad as that one spot. So we tested for other conditions, ruled them out, and went with the theory that I was experiencing muscle spasms related to the allergy. We went through a few kinds of pain killers and I ended up on 400mg of Celebrex every day, as well as 40mg of Zyrtec for the allergy, for the next several years. Just so I could get through the day.
And you don't need to take my word that fibromyalgia (FS for short) is a legitimate thing just because someone as poor as me isn't going to shell out that amount of money on pills unless I absolutely have to. There is now demonstrable evidence of FS. According to the Mayo Clinic (I checked out their FS DVD from the library) MRIs of FS patients show that those patients' brains light up brighter and in different places to the same level of pain stimulus than the control subjects. I also heard on one of those doctor shows that there are measurable increases in stress hormones in the spinal fluid of FS patients. The muscles also function differently. When you curl your arm, for example, as the "inside" muscles contract the "outside" muscles normally relax, and vice versa for the opposite motion. Not so for FS sufferers. All the muscles stay tense for both motions.
Practically speaking, though, most doctors are not going to scan your brain to make a diagnosis. They're going to rely on your reported history, check that you have pain at at least 11 of 18 trigger points throughout your body, and ask about an assortment of side conditions - insomnia (basically standard), depression, IBS, TMJ, hypersensitivity to light or sound, sinus problems, and many more. About a dozen or so conditions, I think. And then, they're going to run a bunch of tests for other conditions, like lupus or rheumatoid arthritis, to rule them out. If those show up negative, your doc may prescribe one of the newer fibromyalgia drugs, and/or any variety of pain killers, and hope you're not an addict.
Here's the next thing to remember about fibromyalgia. The medical establishment is not sure what or why it is. They're not even exactly sure how those FS drugs are supposed to work on the condition. They have some ideas, they've made a lot of progress, found a lot of correlations, but they're still not sure. The prevailing theory is that the nerves of FS sufferers are overactive (over-reactive, might be a better way to phrase it), for some reason. There is another theory, though, that the problem is at the receiving end of the signal - in your head.
I read a book in the local author section by a Dr. Dryland (for your reference). The way he described it, FS is caused by chronic stress - either physical or mental, your brain doesn't differentiate. What happens is that your brain, responding to a fight or flight situation, will (among other things) pump out a lot of dopamine, which will restrict the amount of signals from your nerve endings that reach your brain. This way you can ignore your sprained ankle while you run away from the lion that's chasing you. The problem is that, in our modern society, the lion can be an evil boss or a crazy girlfriend or your checkbook, and you don't have the chance to get away, hide out in a cave, and recover. You are constantly, for a variety of reasons, in a state of fight-or-flight. Our bodies were not designed for this.
National Geographic put out a great documentary on stress - I highly recommend you Netflix it. It describes a multitude of ways in which chronic stress damages our health, mentally and physically. Dryland asserts that, for FS patients, the ability of the body to make dopamine is essentially worn out so that, as the stress continues, the brain can no longer filter out all the stimulus coming to it. Think of it as having your amp dialed up to 11 all the time. So, then, what used to be uncomfortable and could be ignored now hurts, and your body responds to protect you from this obvious injury. Your body tenses up around the "injury" to protect it as it heals, and because you don't have adequate opportunity to recover, the protective tension becomes a persistent pain of its own. And your body responds... and you can see how this perpetuates the problem.
This theory of FS as a stress-based condition fits best with my own experiences with fibromyalgia. I should also be clear, both theories recognize that there is a stress connection with FS. In all the literature I've read on it, it is noted that there is almost always a stress trigger that kicks off the onset of fibromyalgia. And that trigger could be a bad break-up (as was in the mix in my case) or a localized physical injury that persists until you no longer just hurt in your right knee, but now ache everywhere.
There is also likely to be some underlying stress that has been weakening your system until that one big stress comes along and kicks it off. In fact, they found such a high correlation between fibromyalgia and early childhood trauma that some people assumed that anyone who had FS had been abused as a child. That's an unfortunate stigma that is still being shaken off. But any kind of PTSD could do it. I've speculated that, because of the prevalence of PTSD among our veterans, fibromyalgia could be rampant and going unrecognized or undiagnosed. It's in the nature of a soldier to ignore pain, after all.
The good news, though, is that whether the cause is in the sender (the nerves) or the receiver (the brain), there is a lot that can be done to reduce the pain FS sufferers experience without the drugs. So, here's the practical stuff I've picked up over the years...
Practical Stress Reduction Tips for Sufferers...
(add a chocolate muffin to that list of what I'm not supposed to be doing... it's hot, it was looking on the verge of being all melty...)
1. SLEEP! You knew it was going to be the top of the list. It is the hardest and the most important piece of your pain puzzle. I was told by one of my physical therapists that six hours of good sleep is the absolute minimum your body needs to do its everyday repair work. Six goooood hours. If you have the insurance or the credit line to cover it, I highly recommend doing a sleep study. You may be getting more than six hours now (and your body might naturally want more than that for optimum function) but if you don't feel rested and refreshed and less achy when you get up, then there is probably some kind of undiagnosed sleep problem that is keeping your body from getting that deep sleep it needs to do that vital repair work.
2. Exercise. This is also vital and very, very difficult. From what I've read, there is little to no damage to the actual muscles of an FS sufferer beyond the regular damage of under-use. (You know, even "FS sufferer" is kind of cumbersome, so I think I'm going to start using "fibromyalgier" if you don't mind... You don't? Why, thank you!) The important thing to remember is to start extremely slow and gentle. But persistently. There are days I think I can do a mile or two, no problem, but end up knowing I've gone too far less than halfway out. And once I've hurt myself by overdoing it, it takes me much, much longer to recover. A simple knot in my calf can last weeks or longer, while the average person could work it out in a few days. So, just start with five minutes of walking every day. Then go up a minute each successive day. The main issue is consistency.
It's also worth the money to see a physical therapist, even if you can only do an initial consultation, because you've probably developed problems you are unaware of just by trying to compensate for the pain. It's also very common to have your pain shift around as you start working out one place or other. So, if you can't get regular visits, see if you can call in once in a while as things come up, and schedule a follow-up or two after several weeks so that you can adapt your exercises to your evolving needs.
Here's another side-note for those of you fibromyalgiers with hyper-mobile joints (i.e., the double-jointed)... There is a high correlation between FS and hypermobility, possibly because you may not realize that you are extra-stretchy all throughout your body and it is very easy to over-stretch your muscles simply because your ligaments will allow you to go farther than your muscles ought to. Think of it like having porcelain muscles and rag-doll joints. This makes a physical therapy plan extra important for you because you need more stability for your skeleton and are more likely to have your body over-correct itself as you begin P.T. (This problem is compounded when/if you get pregnant because your body releases a hormone to make your ligaments extra stretchier, fyi).
Oh, and exercise helps reduce your stress, boosts your mood, and helps you sleep.
3. Shrink your head... Or get someone to do it for you. Chances are there's some kind of unresolved something going on that needs to be properly addressed. Sometimes you just weren't screwed up enough to warrant professional help so you missed out on all these wonderful coping techniques that we "special" people got to be introduced to. In either case, it probably couldn't hurt to talk to someone (a little, or a lot), either to process some long over-due baggage, or just to get some good stress management tips.
4. Diet. A well-balanced diet is duh important for overall body function, helps your mood, and helps you sleep. But two more important things. First, chronic stress has damaged your gut. There was a study with rats that showed that even low levels of constant stress, but especially severe acute stress, will erode the lining of your intestines. This whacks you out in ways I can't even begin to describe. The important take-away is that it screws up how you process and produce stress hormones, which you can see is counter-productive for your goal of stress reduction. It's also probably causing a multitude of those uncomfortable secondary conditions, like IBS and lactose intolerance, and in my case, an allergic reaction to lactose intolerance. So in addition to not stressing out your system anymore with crap food, you should look into "reseeding" the good flora in your gut. I started with simple acidophilus pills and I was able to reverse my allergic reaction. I am no longer head to toe hives all day, every day, though I still take a couple dairy pills if I'm eating ice cream. If I were in optimum health, perhaps I wouldn't need that.
The second dietary note is that certain foods are going to make your pain worse simply because they have an inherent inflammatory effect. Sugar (whole natural sugars, like in fruit, are fine), caffeine, excite those nerve endings in anybody, but it's like pouring lemon juice on a paper cut if you have FS. Also, dairy and gluten (mostly from our modern, hybridized, processed wheat), are stressful to your gut, so you should try to avoid and minimize them, particularly in a single sitting.
Be careful with your milk alternatives, though. There are a lot of genetically modified (and unlabeled) ingredients and additives and artificial sweeteners (carrageenan was thought to be the new wonder alternative so it's in everything, but it's looking like it's not so great, either... better than flippin' aspertame, though). Also, there are now warnings against giving a lot of soy milk to young kids, especially boys, because it appears to be interfering with hormone function. Or something. Anyway, you generally don't have to avoid anything like the plague, just minimize and diversify. Look up diets that are specifically anti-inflammatory. And go as organic as you can afford. Our doc stresses organic for the animal-based foods, and for those top most contaminated fruits and veggies, like apples, strawberries, and spinach.
I gave up sugar while working in a chocolate shop. It can be done, and the results were dramatic. I had been going through a period of severe stress and I had been taking more and more pain killers than was recommended as my pain increased. I was relying on 9 (or more) naproxen sodium (Aleve) every day. Yes, it was that bad. The maximum dose is supposed to be 3. And it wasn't enough to knock it out. But at the same time I reached a kind of resolution to my major stressor, I cut out the sugar (quality checking the sample tray), and in less than a month I was down to two or three naproxen a day. And then I pregnant, but that's a whole other chapter in the fibromyalgia fun-book.
5. Magnesium and other pills. It's worth checking your vitamin and mineral levels, if possible, as part of your diagnostic process, to see if there are any deficiencies. And while I didn't turn up a deficiency in magnesium, I did find it very beneficial to take it as a supplement anyway. It is very popular among fibromyalgiers because it is a natural relaxant, so it helps with the pain and with your sleep. However, even with supplements, you should be consulting your doctor, or other knowledgeable practitioner (pharmacist, nutritionist). Even these natural supplements can interact with other medications and with each other. For example, calcium and magnesium kind of work against each other (calcium helps your muscles contract, as magnesium helps them relax), and vitamin D helps you process and produce calcium. All this was tricky for me to figure out, and it took a lot of trial and error and self-awareness to find where I need to be. I found that I needed to take at least double the magnesium as calcium, and that amount changed when I added the D (which I am deficient in). Most FS books I've read recommend starting with 300mg of magnesium, and adjusting from there as needed.
Other supplements I take for the pain include vitamin E, fish oil, and turmeric (anti-inflammatory) if I have the money and can get the brand I like. That last one has been inconsistent for me and I have found the benefit mostly in the higher dose and mostly a particular brand that included ginger, which may have affected its overall effectiveness. For me, at least. The bottom line is I can't afford to spend money on anything that isn't doing what it needs to do, and I drop things and reintroduce them periodically to make sure they are worth the cost and effort.
For mood, I take a B-complex, as well as a kind of methylfolate thingy (through my doctor's office, related to another deficiency they tested me for), and taurine (an amino acid), which hugely helped me transition off Zoloft many years ago.
I take a few other things - Vitamin C is a great booster for just about everything - but those are the core supplements that help for me. Oh, and I take some melatonin and (generic) Tylenol PM to help me sleep.
It's also important to focus on getting as much of these things naturally through your food, and to adjust your supplementing accordingly. This is what I suck at the most, but try to keep it in mind anyway.
6. Drugs. At some point, the pain needs to stop. You need that interruption for long enough to break the pain cycle and allow the healing process to begin. I can't tell you if any of the FS drugs are effective because I never took them. The important thing is that you try to focus on pain killers as a temporary intervention, but take what you need (don't exceed the recommended dosage) when you need to take it.
... So that's what works for me. When I'm good and do all that... I'm happy to get even more specific for anyone that would like to know more... like exact doses of pills, different exercises I've done, or how I had my second baby with no drugs... during the labor anyway... first question afterwards was, "can I have drugs now?"... For anyone else, though, I'm sure this is more than enough for now.
Fun times!
Saturday, May 4, 2013
The darling buds of May...
Rogue Valley Roasting Co.
Big Iced Hibiscus Tea
Banana Bread
If you know and love me then you should come visit me. Right now. If you have only a lukewarm interest in me, personally, but had enough free time to kill to read this blog, then you should use me as an excuse to get to southern Oregon. It is epically gorgeous right now. It helps if you're into lush green parks and quaint (if somewhat overpriced) crafty, kitschy small-business-y stores. And Shakespeare. He's kinda big here. In all honesty, I have yet to go to a single play, but I enjoy all the Shakespeare puns around town (Puck's Donuts, As-You-Store-It, and the new Oberon's Tavern). I also admit to buying a giant eraser with the words, "Out damn spot!" printed on it. I kinda had to.
There is also a little Artisans Market thingy on the weekends that I wandered through today. It is so inspiring to see things, you know - made. The first stall had lovely hippy skirts and dresses, and I thought, I could do this. Then the different types of jewelry makers... I could braid hemp chokers... I could work with metal wire and pretty stones and crap like that... Oo, fabric again - pillows! Hats! Braided rugs! Pithy fridge magnets made out of metal bottle caps! A guy singing and playing guitar - I could... well, I could sing... while I sat at my little booth and made... whatever. Handmade journals. Purses. Useful things. I was so full of ideas and confidence for three whole blocks.
Then I got maudlin. Craft faire stuff. That's what I want to invest myself in?
If you haven't guessed, I'm in one of those "what the hell am I doing?" kind of mental states. What do I want to do? to be? Where do I want to be? Should we stay in Ashland? If not here - where?
Since I did not go straight back to work this time, after O-boy, I've been trying to reconcile myself with this non-employed state. I have thought about just trying to focus on being totally engaged with the boys, and getting a little "off time" on the weekend. But that has felt wasteful and unstructured and unproductive. The problem is that there is so much "week" that I can't take care of that it has to be done on the weekend. But I feel bad if I'm not doing something beyond the tasks of just staying alive. So I started this bloggy thingy, trying to cultivate some writing habit. Mixed success so far. I'm not really satisfied with how things are going, to be honest. But I feel like I have to stay with it, mostly for the sake of staying with it.
But to what end? I feel like I have things to say, arguments to make, for the "greater good" or something grandiose like that. But I mostly feel like I'm soapboxing the walls. Who cares what I have to say? What difference will it make? I look at the world and I cannot let it stand as it is. To watch the (expletives and adjectives deleted) people running things into the ground, to the detriment of all, it makes my stomach burn. But to put myself out there feels like I've just stepped out of the bathroom with my emotional skirt stuffed into my emotional undies.
I like Ben Fold's retort, "Do it anyway!" But do what?
Despite our fragile financial state, I've decided that it's a waste to continue to seek out a job that doesn't advance whatever ultimate goals I have. But I'm still not quite sure what it is I ultimately want to do. Before I die. I'm trying to remind myself of that to - in a healthy way. I'm going to do whatever I'm going to do and then I'm going to kick off. The future world will go on without me and then it, too, will fade, or explode. The current thinking of the great thinkers is that the universe will expand and cool and grow dark and still... and that'll be it for everything and everyone who may have been around at some point ever.
So who cares? Why get stressed about anything? Why stick around, especially if you have no afterlife in mind to scare you or to give you peace in thoughts of a perpetual life beyond a frozen universe?
Well, that's your existential quandary to square yourself with. For my part, I have chosen to live. And I shall respect the rest of those who have chosen the same. So if we're here, we're gonna do this whole life thing, then we need to make it liveable for each other. For "rough winds do shake the darling buds..." But it is May. The universe may die in winter, but the sun has just pushed ahead of the clouds, and the world is beautiful. Right now.
Big Iced Hibiscus Tea
Banana Bread
If you know and love me then you should come visit me. Right now. If you have only a lukewarm interest in me, personally, but had enough free time to kill to read this blog, then you should use me as an excuse to get to southern Oregon. It is epically gorgeous right now. It helps if you're into lush green parks and quaint (if somewhat overpriced) crafty, kitschy small-business-y stores. And Shakespeare. He's kinda big here. In all honesty, I have yet to go to a single play, but I enjoy all the Shakespeare puns around town (Puck's Donuts, As-You-Store-It, and the new Oberon's Tavern). I also admit to buying a giant eraser with the words, "Out damn spot!" printed on it. I kinda had to.
There is also a little Artisans Market thingy on the weekends that I wandered through today. It is so inspiring to see things, you know - made. The first stall had lovely hippy skirts and dresses, and I thought, I could do this. Then the different types of jewelry makers... I could braid hemp chokers... I could work with metal wire and pretty stones and crap like that... Oo, fabric again - pillows! Hats! Braided rugs! Pithy fridge magnets made out of metal bottle caps! A guy singing and playing guitar - I could... well, I could sing... while I sat at my little booth and made... whatever. Handmade journals. Purses. Useful things. I was so full of ideas and confidence for three whole blocks.
Then I got maudlin. Craft faire stuff. That's what I want to invest myself in?
If you haven't guessed, I'm in one of those "what the hell am I doing?" kind of mental states. What do I want to do? to be? Where do I want to be? Should we stay in Ashland? If not here - where?
Since I did not go straight back to work this time, after O-boy, I've been trying to reconcile myself with this non-employed state. I have thought about just trying to focus on being totally engaged with the boys, and getting a little "off time" on the weekend. But that has felt wasteful and unstructured and unproductive. The problem is that there is so much "week" that I can't take care of that it has to be done on the weekend. But I feel bad if I'm not doing something beyond the tasks of just staying alive. So I started this bloggy thingy, trying to cultivate some writing habit. Mixed success so far. I'm not really satisfied with how things are going, to be honest. But I feel like I have to stay with it, mostly for the sake of staying with it.
But to what end? I feel like I have things to say, arguments to make, for the "greater good" or something grandiose like that. But I mostly feel like I'm soapboxing the walls. Who cares what I have to say? What difference will it make? I look at the world and I cannot let it stand as it is. To watch the (expletives and adjectives deleted) people running things into the ground, to the detriment of all, it makes my stomach burn. But to put myself out there feels like I've just stepped out of the bathroom with my emotional skirt stuffed into my emotional undies.
I like Ben Fold's retort, "Do it anyway!" But do what?
Despite our fragile financial state, I've decided that it's a waste to continue to seek out a job that doesn't advance whatever ultimate goals I have. But I'm still not quite sure what it is I ultimately want to do. Before I die. I'm trying to remind myself of that to - in a healthy way. I'm going to do whatever I'm going to do and then I'm going to kick off. The future world will go on without me and then it, too, will fade, or explode. The current thinking of the great thinkers is that the universe will expand and cool and grow dark and still... and that'll be it for everything and everyone who may have been around at some point ever.
So who cares? Why get stressed about anything? Why stick around, especially if you have no afterlife in mind to scare you or to give you peace in thoughts of a perpetual life beyond a frozen universe?
Well, that's your existential quandary to square yourself with. For my part, I have chosen to live. And I shall respect the rest of those who have chosen the same. So if we're here, we're gonna do this whole life thing, then we need to make it liveable for each other. For "rough winds do shake the darling buds..." But it is May. The universe may die in winter, but the sun has just pushed ahead of the clouds, and the world is beautiful. Right now.
Saturday, April 20, 2013
The Chair waits for you...
Downtowne Coffee
12oz Soy Black Swan Mocha
Ginger Cookie
I feel everything. Since the dramatic movie-style finish to the manhunt yesterday I have found myself trying to have every emotion at once. The world has been surreal. For an American, anyway. I happened to catch the dramatic beginning of the standoff at 11pm the night before and resigned myself to being up till 3am - the kitchen needed to be cleaned anyway - as the details slowly unraveled and it became more apparent that these were the two marathon bombers.
I gave a whispered synopsis to the "little man" as I climbed into bed. He declared, equally quietly, that he hoped the officers shot the guy - no trial to line the pockets of lawyers, no pleas of innocence and speeches of martyrdom. Just kill 'im.
Clearer pictures came the next day, as did stories. The elder brother, hot-headed, extreme and intolerant in his religious observance. The younger brother, still at large after the bloody gun-battle (not an exaggeration, for once) the night before... to everyone who spoke of him, in every way, seemingly a good kid. And yet, what he had done...
The day of the bombing I had felt, as many, the acute feeling of loss and fear that any parent feels. The horror of hearing about children missing limbs, as I looked at my little boys playing, laughing, giving each other hugs and even kissing the other's boo-boos... often after inflicting them... And I thought then of all the mothers everywhere and the children they have lost to bombs and guns and all the horrors of the world. I didn't need a bomb to remind me. It simply gave me another opportunity to feel their pain fresh.
And yesterday, as I listened to the reports... there are helicopters circling... tons of cop cars lining one street... and finally, he's in custody... I thought of one more mother. The mother half around the world absolutely refusing to believe that her boys had become monsters.
"I shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die... When I hear that whistle blowin', I hang my head and cry..."
Johnny Cash is on the overhead play, singing of remorse for his heinous deeds, right now as I type this. (Literally right now - no kidding. Crazy world.)
I can't explain why, but the moment I heard the two suspects in the blurry photos were brothers, something caught inside me. Brothers. Just like my little boys.
I am relieved that the final standoff ended as peacefully as it could have. I'm glad there's a chance now that the victims and their families have someone to face, and that we might be given some kind of answer as to why these young men chose to do this horrible, horrible thing. I'm also glad that the mother unloved by most of we shell-shocked onlookers will have her son a little longer, at least, so that she too can look him in the eye and ask why. And, also, so that she can say good-bye to the child she knew.
The story of the bombings and the fatal manhunt was not the only horrible story in the world this week. It sounds crazy, but I don't even know if it's the worst. And they just keep coming. To greater and lesser degree, there is no shortage of stories of people being horrible to other people. And from all this one theme has struck me: Otherism.
It seems the root of all this evil. The moment we create an artificial division, a category between one person and another person, we can then diminish them, by category. It's not just the obvious color categories our country grew up with, White vs. Anybody Else. And it's not just by country or religion, or sect within a religion. It's social groups, too. It's Rich vs. Middle Class vs. The Poor. It's Yankees fans, and Red Sox fans, and football hooligans. It's Republicans vs. Democrats. It's Men vs. Women. It's Conformists vs. Deviants. Straights vs. queers. Bullies vs. Sluts, Geeks, Stoners... Whatevers... Beliebers vs. People Who Like Music.
(Okay, cheap shot.)
And once these Others can be categorized, they can have lesser attributes attached to them, and their inherent rights and dignities can then be ignored. It's okay to treat Them that way, because They aren't Us. There are more hateful slurs than there are words on this page. Far, far more.
And now, that white Republican male, Senator Lindsay Graham, has just called upon President Obama to classify the young terrorist as an "enemy combatant" so that he can be handed over to the military. As if our justice system is a luxury reserved only for Our Kind. Our kind of criminal?
Does everyone remember why the term "enemy combatant" was invented? The answer is in the UN's Declaration of Human Rights. In that document, the United Nations spells out what rights shall be respected for all people around the world. And they felt it necessary, from grim experience, to spell out all the many classifications that could NOT be used to deny any person these rights. When they said "all" they meant "all," damn it, and no country get's out of respecting these rights. Period.
So the United States, under the Bush Administration, created the new category of "enemy combatant" to get around it. And if anybody but the United States had done it, they would have answered for it. Or they would have, at least, been given a stern warning, never to be followed up on.
But "these people" are different... they always say. Just insert your least favorite category in between the quote marks.
Let me leave you with one final story, before they kick me out of this coffeehouse. A while ago I heard a story (you Google it) from a high school. Two boys had gotten in trouble for fighting, or some such, and the principle, or whomever, had come up with an "innovative" choice of punishment. He had the boys sit in a couple of chairs and forced them hold hands, while the surrounding student body was encouraged to shout homophobic slurs.
Yeah, that happened.
I hope that one day when my boys are older, if they were to stand amongst that crowd, I hope that they would not go along with the crowd. I hope that they will be the kind of people who would dare to walk forward and challenge the crowd. I hope that they would speak for all the people who have been shamed, who have been abused, and how the hate is nonsensical, evil. I hope that they would say that it is only happenstance that those two are in the chair and anyone else is in the crowd. The crowd is not a safe place. But a community is. A community which does not value dominance. A community which rejects artificial divisions and celebrates real differences. A community which embraces and respects all, which loves and supports any person in need. A community which recognizes that every person is a person and has within them the capacity for both good and evil. And the first act of evil is bringing out that chair.
The crowd is not safe. The crowd will turn on you. They'll find a reason. There is no membership to be revoked. No reason needs to be found to put you in the chair.
Closing time.
No edits.
12oz Soy Black Swan Mocha
Ginger Cookie
I feel everything. Since the dramatic movie-style finish to the manhunt yesterday I have found myself trying to have every emotion at once. The world has been surreal. For an American, anyway. I happened to catch the dramatic beginning of the standoff at 11pm the night before and resigned myself to being up till 3am - the kitchen needed to be cleaned anyway - as the details slowly unraveled and it became more apparent that these were the two marathon bombers.
I gave a whispered synopsis to the "little man" as I climbed into bed. He declared, equally quietly, that he hoped the officers shot the guy - no trial to line the pockets of lawyers, no pleas of innocence and speeches of martyrdom. Just kill 'im.
Clearer pictures came the next day, as did stories. The elder brother, hot-headed, extreme and intolerant in his religious observance. The younger brother, still at large after the bloody gun-battle (not an exaggeration, for once) the night before... to everyone who spoke of him, in every way, seemingly a good kid. And yet, what he had done...
The day of the bombing I had felt, as many, the acute feeling of loss and fear that any parent feels. The horror of hearing about children missing limbs, as I looked at my little boys playing, laughing, giving each other hugs and even kissing the other's boo-boos... often after inflicting them... And I thought then of all the mothers everywhere and the children they have lost to bombs and guns and all the horrors of the world. I didn't need a bomb to remind me. It simply gave me another opportunity to feel their pain fresh.
And yesterday, as I listened to the reports... there are helicopters circling... tons of cop cars lining one street... and finally, he's in custody... I thought of one more mother. The mother half around the world absolutely refusing to believe that her boys had become monsters.
"I shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die... When I hear that whistle blowin', I hang my head and cry..."
Johnny Cash is on the overhead play, singing of remorse for his heinous deeds, right now as I type this. (Literally right now - no kidding. Crazy world.)
I can't explain why, but the moment I heard the two suspects in the blurry photos were brothers, something caught inside me. Brothers. Just like my little boys.
I am relieved that the final standoff ended as peacefully as it could have. I'm glad there's a chance now that the victims and their families have someone to face, and that we might be given some kind of answer as to why these young men chose to do this horrible, horrible thing. I'm also glad that the mother unloved by most of we shell-shocked onlookers will have her son a little longer, at least, so that she too can look him in the eye and ask why. And, also, so that she can say good-bye to the child she knew.
The story of the bombings and the fatal manhunt was not the only horrible story in the world this week. It sounds crazy, but I don't even know if it's the worst. And they just keep coming. To greater and lesser degree, there is no shortage of stories of people being horrible to other people. And from all this one theme has struck me: Otherism.
It seems the root of all this evil. The moment we create an artificial division, a category between one person and another person, we can then diminish them, by category. It's not just the obvious color categories our country grew up with, White vs. Anybody Else. And it's not just by country or religion, or sect within a religion. It's social groups, too. It's Rich vs. Middle Class vs. The Poor. It's Yankees fans, and Red Sox fans, and football hooligans. It's Republicans vs. Democrats. It's Men vs. Women. It's Conformists vs. Deviants. Straights vs. queers. Bullies vs. Sluts, Geeks, Stoners... Whatevers... Beliebers vs. People Who Like Music.
(Okay, cheap shot.)
And once these Others can be categorized, they can have lesser attributes attached to them, and their inherent rights and dignities can then be ignored. It's okay to treat Them that way, because They aren't Us. There are more hateful slurs than there are words on this page. Far, far more.
And now, that white Republican male, Senator Lindsay Graham, has just called upon President Obama to classify the young terrorist as an "enemy combatant" so that he can be handed over to the military. As if our justice system is a luxury reserved only for Our Kind. Our kind of criminal?
Does everyone remember why the term "enemy combatant" was invented? The answer is in the UN's Declaration of Human Rights. In that document, the United Nations spells out what rights shall be respected for all people around the world. And they felt it necessary, from grim experience, to spell out all the many classifications that could NOT be used to deny any person these rights. When they said "all" they meant "all," damn it, and no country get's out of respecting these rights. Period.
So the United States, under the Bush Administration, created the new category of "enemy combatant" to get around it. And if anybody but the United States had done it, they would have answered for it. Or they would have, at least, been given a stern warning, never to be followed up on.
But "these people" are different... they always say. Just insert your least favorite category in between the quote marks.
Let me leave you with one final story, before they kick me out of this coffeehouse. A while ago I heard a story (you Google it) from a high school. Two boys had gotten in trouble for fighting, or some such, and the principle, or whomever, had come up with an "innovative" choice of punishment. He had the boys sit in a couple of chairs and forced them hold hands, while the surrounding student body was encouraged to shout homophobic slurs.
Yeah, that happened.
I hope that one day when my boys are older, if they were to stand amongst that crowd, I hope that they would not go along with the crowd. I hope that they will be the kind of people who would dare to walk forward and challenge the crowd. I hope that they would speak for all the people who have been shamed, who have been abused, and how the hate is nonsensical, evil. I hope that they would say that it is only happenstance that those two are in the chair and anyone else is in the crowd. The crowd is not a safe place. But a community is. A community which does not value dominance. A community which rejects artificial divisions and celebrates real differences. A community which embraces and respects all, which loves and supports any person in need. A community which recognizes that every person is a person and has within them the capacity for both good and evil. And the first act of evil is bringing out that chair.
The crowd is not safe. The crowd will turn on you. They'll find a reason. There is no membership to be revoked. No reason needs to be found to put you in the chair.
Closing time.
No edits.
Saturday, April 13, 2013
Miller's Facepalm... and some economics stuff...
Rogue Roasting Company
12oz double Soy Vanilla Mocha
Breadpudding Muffin
I have created my own axiom. It reduces to the utterly simple philosophy, "Don't do big things dumb." I have dubbed it: Miller's Facepalm.
I have formally announced it on Facebook, and I have now begun to use it as a short-hand in the comment sections of friends' posts. An example, you ask? The 2008 economic implosion was principally caused by the irresponsible and/or illegal actions of major financial institutions on Wall Street. The obvious response would be to increase and improve regulation and incarcerate those responsible for the actual illegal actions, if not for the actions that should have been illegal. As of 2013, we have fewer regulations and the banks responsible for crashing our economy have been declared too big to prosecute.
Miller's Facepalm.
Homeowners who were illegally evicted have received less in their settlements than the the consultant paid to look at the fraudulent paperwork used to evict them.
Miller's Facepalm.
Austerity.
Miller's Facepalm.
Chained CPI may or may not be the more efficient way to calculate inflation for the elderly, but to implement it when these "wildly" inflated Social Security checks have not led to the current economic crisis, nor to Social Security checks being enough to keep many seniors out of poverty...
Miller's Facepalm.
Obviously, I'm on an economics kick here, but this principle applies to anything big, anything systemic. This is not your everyday "d'oh!" This is not leaving your keys in the refrigerator, or on top of your car as you go walking downtown (twice). This is big time dumbass. This is waging an ill-conceived and illegal war. This is instituting a huge reform to the broken healthcare system that does little to nothing to rein in the main drivers of increasing health care costs. This is mandating that the woman keep the baby but cutting any assistance that would help her care for it. This is obsessing about tax rates but completely ignoring wages and other forms of compensation.
Speaking of wages... I literally did a fist pump, jumped up and down, and shouted, "About damn time!" at the TV when the president mentioned raising minimum wage in the State of the Union this year. My biggest reason for moving to Oregon was the minimum-wage-to-cost-of-living ratio, as compared to that of California's. The cost of living in Cali is about 2 to 3 times that of Oregon, yet Oregon has the higher minimum wage. How has this come to pass? Unlike California, Oregon's minimum wage adjusts automatically every year based on inflation. Shockingly, this has not crashed the Oregon economy, though wage-stifling California has come oh-so-close to complete implosion. Obviously, economies are complex and cannot be reduced to one simple factor, but this does seem to conflict with the prevailing argument that raising minimum wage in a recession (or at any other time) absolutely cannot be done.
Since minimum wage is the baseline around which the whole economy must harmonize, it is the first and most important piece to tune correctly. Right now, in most parts of the country, it is striking a bitter chord. Sometimes literally (have you heard about the fast food workers' strike in New York?). What we first need to ask ourselves - in order to avoid a Miller's Facepalm - is what should minimum wage cover? This is a question of our values.
Should it cover the cost of living for a single person, or should it be assumed that, at some point, a minimum wage worker will have to cover expenses of a spouse, child, or other relative? Should we presume that a minimum wage worker should not have to pay the full cost of housing because they must live with someone else, like a parent or roommate? Isn't that real cost deferred to other people? Won't their income be decreased proportionally by covering the additional expenses of housing (and feeding, and the additional use of utilities by) the minimum wage worker? Should costs of living include savings for long-term costs and eventualities? What about raising a family? If our ideal is a married two-parent family unit, but a single income can't support the cost of raising even one child, haven't we broken that ideal? If both parents are economically required to work, then a third party must be introduced to raise the child while the parents work. And even if there is a willing social partner (Grandma, Aunt Ida, mom's bff who has a tot or two of her own, etc.) available to take on the childcare responsibilities to enable the second parent to work, there is an additional cost - paid in kind by the caregiver, or by the parent to the daycare or babysitter.
There is a cost paid by the child, too. It may not be a calamity to have an additional caregiver in their life - that can be a great asset. But there is a limit to that benefit. A young child is only awake about a dozen hours of the day. If they're spending a full work day, plus commute - maybe 8, 10 hours a day - with other people, then who is really doing the parenting? Don't we have the right to raise our own children, even if we're poor?
And should there be such a thing as the "working poor"? If a man or woman puts in a full day's, and a full week's work, even if it's a menial job, a little pitiful "meaningless" job, shouldn't they be entitled to a living wage? They are not pursuing their own projects or ambitions - not on the clock. They are not back-packing across Europe to "find themselves" or working on their Great American Novel. They are working to help another person's business thrive. These are the hours of their life - they do not get them back. Doesn't that earn them a decent, independent living?
If you agree to these things in principle, that even menial workers should be able to afford to take care of themselves on a basic level, save a little for the future, and maybe even start a tiny family, without having to ask anyone else for help, then you should be at least figuratively rioting in the virtual streets over the injustice of the current minimum wage. Even in Oregon, where an individual worker has a fighting chance of living alone on a minimum wage income, wages still fall far, far short of providing these things we believe in. No one is talking about minimum wage covering 19 kids or a 30-year mortgage, but could I maybe live somewhere that doesn't have my neighbor's cigarette smoke coming through the heating vent? Could I maybe not have to flash my economic undies for the state every few months to feed my 2 kids and make sure they can go to the doctor? Where is the dignity in that? in being degraded for working hard for a real small business that can't afford to be the only business in their market to pay you fairly? Where is the respect for the worker who doesn't dare quit the job that treats him so inhumanely because he is so easy to replace, and not enough money is better than no money at all?
Okay, this is just the beginning of the conversation wherein I debunk all the nonsensical arguments against paying people what they are due. I am, unfortunately, running out of coffee money and must wrap this up.
There are, clearly, many dumb ways to go about raising minimum wage. However, not raising it at all, playing these shell games with costs, and allowing millions of people to continue to suffer and exhaust themselves for no good reason, that is the dumbest damn thing of all.
Everybody now...
Miller's Facepalm.
12oz double Soy Vanilla Mocha
Breadpudding Muffin
I have created my own axiom. It reduces to the utterly simple philosophy, "Don't do big things dumb." I have dubbed it: Miller's Facepalm.
I have formally announced it on Facebook, and I have now begun to use it as a short-hand in the comment sections of friends' posts. An example, you ask? The 2008 economic implosion was principally caused by the irresponsible and/or illegal actions of major financial institutions on Wall Street. The obvious response would be to increase and improve regulation and incarcerate those responsible for the actual illegal actions, if not for the actions that should have been illegal. As of 2013, we have fewer regulations and the banks responsible for crashing our economy have been declared too big to prosecute.
Miller's Facepalm.
Homeowners who were illegally evicted have received less in their settlements than the the consultant paid to look at the fraudulent paperwork used to evict them.
Miller's Facepalm.
Austerity.
Miller's Facepalm.
Chained CPI may or may not be the more efficient way to calculate inflation for the elderly, but to implement it when these "wildly" inflated Social Security checks have not led to the current economic crisis, nor to Social Security checks being enough to keep many seniors out of poverty...
Miller's Facepalm.
Obviously, I'm on an economics kick here, but this principle applies to anything big, anything systemic. This is not your everyday "d'oh!" This is not leaving your keys in the refrigerator, or on top of your car as you go walking downtown (twice). This is big time dumbass. This is waging an ill-conceived and illegal war. This is instituting a huge reform to the broken healthcare system that does little to nothing to rein in the main drivers of increasing health care costs. This is mandating that the woman keep the baby but cutting any assistance that would help her care for it. This is obsessing about tax rates but completely ignoring wages and other forms of compensation.
Speaking of wages... I literally did a fist pump, jumped up and down, and shouted, "About damn time!" at the TV when the president mentioned raising minimum wage in the State of the Union this year. My biggest reason for moving to Oregon was the minimum-wage-to-cost-of-living ratio, as compared to that of California's. The cost of living in Cali is about 2 to 3 times that of Oregon, yet Oregon has the higher minimum wage. How has this come to pass? Unlike California, Oregon's minimum wage adjusts automatically every year based on inflation. Shockingly, this has not crashed the Oregon economy, though wage-stifling California has come oh-so-close to complete implosion. Obviously, economies are complex and cannot be reduced to one simple factor, but this does seem to conflict with the prevailing argument that raising minimum wage in a recession (or at any other time) absolutely cannot be done.
Since minimum wage is the baseline around which the whole economy must harmonize, it is the first and most important piece to tune correctly. Right now, in most parts of the country, it is striking a bitter chord. Sometimes literally (have you heard about the fast food workers' strike in New York?). What we first need to ask ourselves - in order to avoid a Miller's Facepalm - is what should minimum wage cover? This is a question of our values.
Should it cover the cost of living for a single person, or should it be assumed that, at some point, a minimum wage worker will have to cover expenses of a spouse, child, or other relative? Should we presume that a minimum wage worker should not have to pay the full cost of housing because they must live with someone else, like a parent or roommate? Isn't that real cost deferred to other people? Won't their income be decreased proportionally by covering the additional expenses of housing (and feeding, and the additional use of utilities by) the minimum wage worker? Should costs of living include savings for long-term costs and eventualities? What about raising a family? If our ideal is a married two-parent family unit, but a single income can't support the cost of raising even one child, haven't we broken that ideal? If both parents are economically required to work, then a third party must be introduced to raise the child while the parents work. And even if there is a willing social partner (Grandma, Aunt Ida, mom's bff who has a tot or two of her own, etc.) available to take on the childcare responsibilities to enable the second parent to work, there is an additional cost - paid in kind by the caregiver, or by the parent to the daycare or babysitter.
There is a cost paid by the child, too. It may not be a calamity to have an additional caregiver in their life - that can be a great asset. But there is a limit to that benefit. A young child is only awake about a dozen hours of the day. If they're spending a full work day, plus commute - maybe 8, 10 hours a day - with other people, then who is really doing the parenting? Don't we have the right to raise our own children, even if we're poor?
And should there be such a thing as the "working poor"? If a man or woman puts in a full day's, and a full week's work, even if it's a menial job, a little pitiful "meaningless" job, shouldn't they be entitled to a living wage? They are not pursuing their own projects or ambitions - not on the clock. They are not back-packing across Europe to "find themselves" or working on their Great American Novel. They are working to help another person's business thrive. These are the hours of their life - they do not get them back. Doesn't that earn them a decent, independent living?
If you agree to these things in principle, that even menial workers should be able to afford to take care of themselves on a basic level, save a little for the future, and maybe even start a tiny family, without having to ask anyone else for help, then you should be at least figuratively rioting in the virtual streets over the injustice of the current minimum wage. Even in Oregon, where an individual worker has a fighting chance of living alone on a minimum wage income, wages still fall far, far short of providing these things we believe in. No one is talking about minimum wage covering 19 kids or a 30-year mortgage, but could I maybe live somewhere that doesn't have my neighbor's cigarette smoke coming through the heating vent? Could I maybe not have to flash my economic undies for the state every few months to feed my 2 kids and make sure they can go to the doctor? Where is the dignity in that? in being degraded for working hard for a real small business that can't afford to be the only business in their market to pay you fairly? Where is the respect for the worker who doesn't dare quit the job that treats him so inhumanely because he is so easy to replace, and not enough money is better than no money at all?
Okay, this is just the beginning of the conversation wherein I debunk all the nonsensical arguments against paying people what they are due. I am, unfortunately, running out of coffee money and must wrap this up.
There are, clearly, many dumb ways to go about raising minimum wage. However, not raising it at all, playing these shell games with costs, and allowing millions of people to continue to suffer and exhaust themselves for no good reason, that is the dumbest damn thing of all.
Everybody now...
Miller's Facepalm.
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